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Northend win

Last weekend Northend broke perhaps the world’s longest footballing hoodoo in a televised showcase match against a reunited squad of Southenders.

Written by Nick Underdown
Thursday, 28 August 2008

2,473 views   0 comments


Last weekend Northend broke perhaps the world’s longest footballing hoodoo in a televised showcase match against a reunited squad of Southenders. Sky Sports videoed the amazing spectacle of football at the Hayes Ewe camp stadium, as Northend clung on to a 5-4 lead in a match which had it all – from an own-goal blunder to a 50-yard hoofed strike. It was the first match that Northend had won in 16 years and signals a new era for the club and its loyal supporters.

The end for Northend?

One of the questions is where now for Northend? In an exclusive and at times painful post-celebration interview with The Arran Voice the following morning, captain Matt Milne rejected any suggestion that the club would now fade away out of the media limelight. ‘No way. I think we will do things now,' he said. 'We might even get another draw next year, although we are going to struggle with players next season maybe.’

Northend’s win has also prompted allegations that Southend United (once crowned the ‘worst team in Scotland’) are the biggest media hussies on the island. ‘They have to be,’ said Northend’s Matt Milne. ‘But they can take it and keep it. Eddie Picken can wear that hat.’ Eddie, Southend United’s captain and central defender, confirmed the suspicions, saying: ‘Now we are the worst team. It’s official. We’ve got to grab the attention if we can. We’ve been a long time in the doldrums.’ But no longer. They are gloriously and defiantly bottom.

Both Northend Thistle and Southend United hope to turn the match into an annual fixture and Eddie Picken is hopeful that the hastily assembled Southend United will be able to field a team for the 2009 Arran Football League. Speaking to one of the Northend players after the match, Eddie said, ‘For or the first outing in 16 years, we gave you a hell of a good game.’ Matt agreed, ‘I thought for a bunch of guys, some of whom hadn’t played for almost 20 years, they were very decent.’

Watch it on TV

The Northend Thistle versus Southend United match is likely to be aired this Saturday afternoon on Sky Sports’ Gillette Soccer Saturday programme.

The Northend players took to the pitch like F-list celebrities. Andy McKelvie had returned to the fray and although Davie McKinnon had to bow out due to family commitments and there was no sign of Chris Marriott, old hatchets had been buried in Hayes’ park as Swampy took to the field. As Chris Trail announced the name of each player over a PA system, the team shifted uneasily on their feet. Were they setting themselves up for their most public and humiliating defeat yet? Defeat at the feet of a hastily reformed Southend United (previous holders of ‘Scotland’s worst team’ title before they became too old to play) would surely sink the Northend boys into a winter depression that no new seasonal signings or summer optimism could thaw.

And Southend United were going to be no geriatric walkover. Stuart Gough was the most senior player in the visiting squad and his spritely skills had been retained as a high impact substitution for later in the match. Davie Thomas (R.C.), three Pickens, and a few high profile defections from the Southend FC created a solid base for the squad, supplemented by Jon Smith and the rubgy-playing might of Niall McMaster. The morale-boosting Tony Brookes was an eager force up front and Dennis Smith was the most stylish man on the pitch with a vintage pea-green jersey that looked as if it had been sewn for the Southend juniors.

Referee Bryan Miller blew the starting whistle and commenced what proved to be a truly historic fixture. Jon (wicked witch of the South) Smith, sporting his shiny red boots, made an early impression on the match, helping the ball into his own net within the first ten minutes from a Bryan MacCallum delivery. Northend had taken the lead and approximately six minutes later Nick Underdown latched onto a great pass from Swampy down the left wing and stole in past the Southend defence before nutmegging Dennis Smith in goals. 2-0. With Andy MacKelvie coming close on a couple of occasions, Northend were threatening to walk away with the game and Eddie Picken was beginning to wonder whether it had been worth rallying the Southend troops.

But Southend dug in and Davie R.C. Thomas scored a peachy opener for the Southenders to pull one back. His strike from out wide on the right found its way past Robert Simpson in goals and spurred on Southend. Fraser Barr lashed in Southend’s second around the twenty minute mark, with a screaming long range drill-shot that took the Northend by surprise. Suddenly it was very clear to the assembled crowd that there was a match on the cards – this was going to be no media-driven showcase.

Northend steadied the ship and despite a few more close chances for Southend, including a crossbar-rattling header, the home side were the next to score. Accounts of the next two goals are slightly sketchy due to hazy recollections from the usual Northend sources. Striker Bryan MacCallum lashed in two nice goals (including a tussling run-and-ping across goal from right to left, but instead of elaborating from faulty memory, The Arran Voice recommends that you simply watch the Sky Sports coverage (if you have access to it). With Northend leading once again by two goals, it needed a special reply, and Lummy came in from the right wing and squeezed a good strike in from an acute angle to make it 4-3.

Just before half-time, Eddie Picken had an opportunity to level proceedings from the spot, when Jon Smith earned a penalty with an expression that looked as much of a smile as a grimace. Eddie stepped up for the penalty (later admitting to changing his mind in the run up) and Robert Simpson saved.

At half-time Northend were sensing victory. The majority of the second half was tight, tackling play in the midfield and the goalfest of the first half dried up until a free kick was awarded near the half way line. When John Ferguson launched a long ball into the area, the Northend defender soon made up for his own-goal earlier in the league season. The ball sailed clear of the Southend defence and as Peter Milne stretched to get the tip of his boot to it, Dennis Smith came off his line only to see the ball bounce high over his head and into the back of the net. 5-3 Northend.

Frazer Barr dragged one back with another penalty and for the last ten minutes Southend United pummelled the Northend Thistle box, leading to some spectacularly unglamourous clearances, including a goal-mouth handball by Sparky that was missed by the otherwise eagle-eyes of Bryan Miller. But when the full-time whistle eventually sounded, there was as much surprise as anything etched onto the faces of Northend. Winning a match of football was a novel experience for many of the players and touchline supporters cheered on their men, some of whom had supported their team with almost insane loyalty throughout their infamous losing streak. This had been a long day coming.

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